A few weeks ago I was at my Grandmother's house with the kids and Tyler came to help me load them up and take everyone home. It is hard to get them to leave so a little help is appreciated! Madeline was playing under this tree and Tyler was pulling Tucker in the wagon around the yard.
This was my Nephew Luke's favorite tree. I lost Luke and my Brother about 10 years ago. Luke was 5 and my Brother, Lou, was 35. Luke had a swing in this tree. He played in its shade all the time.
A few years ago the tree was struck by lightening and was cut down to the stump. Only a small little skinny twig was growing from the base. That twig has grown into this tree.
I kept thinking about that the day that I was at Maw's with the kids. In my last post I said we "have come a long way." My whole family has come a long way. When we lost Lou and Luke we were cut down. We had been struck by tragedy and we were literally cut down to our cores. None of us knew that we would survive the tragedy of their loss and we didn't expect to. We just all worked to keep breathing and keep going on...day by day...just breathing and going through the motions of life.
I met Tyler and for the first time in a long time I actually felt something...anything...it was like I had a little "twig" of life- actual life and energy and excitement- left that could grow.
And we have grown. From that base, that core that was left of my family we have all grown. And like Luke's tree we are still living and thriving and there is a place for new branches and new life. That stump- that base- that core- will always be stunted. The trunk will always be severed. We can't have that part of our family tree back. But we can grow from that base. We can and have survived the loss.
Our dear friend Matthew has been helping Maw keep Tucker in the afternoons. He and Luke would be close to the same age. Matthew loves my kids so much and I think Luke would have loved them too. I think Luke loves knowing that Madeline and Tucker play under his tree and I think it would thrill him to know that Tucker loves trains as much as he did. And that Mamie is sharing some of his train toys and movies with Tucker.
This day under the tree made me feel very happy and peaceful. Thank you God for that moment and for sharing Your grace.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I think that in the many years I have known you, this is the most you have ever talked about that loss.
ReplyDeleteIt's a beautiful post, picture...and a bittersweet story.
I agree that Luke loves knowing tucker appreciates the same things he DOES. I have to believe that there are trains in heaven. And that even at this very moment, he is up there playing choo choos with other little kiddos.
I love you. You need to get a really good picture of this tree. Frame it and hang it up to see every single day. It signifies so much.