Paper Flowers

Madeline and I spent an afternoon making paper flowers a week ago or so. It was one of those thick dark days where we had all stayed in our pj's. Tyler had had on the football game(s) and the kids had played together. I think I had made some food that we all snacked on all day and Tyler had kept the fire going. It had been a good day. We made paper flowers for my grandmother and for my best friend's mom. Both were in the hospital. Gigi was and is still in CCU and real flowers aren't allowed because of bacteria and also because the rooms are very sparse there. There seems to only be room for the bulky equipment required in the room and the bed. There aren't chairs and the visiting hours are very limited. Children under 10 aren't allowed in the waiting room and children under 14 aren't allowed into the unit. The kids don't fully know yet why Gigi is there but they have known she has been sick for quite some time.

I didn't take the flowers and poster Madeline had made Gigi there until yesterday. I was certain that it was going to be the day that she woke up and I wanted her to see them and immediately know how much she was loved and missed. I cleared the decorations with the front desk and placed them in her room. All day yesterday I held her hand and never left her side. I think there were times when she could hear me but I'm not certain that she ever really saw me. I think she knew I was there.

She still isn't awake and we still don't know what will happen next yet. It will be up to her and her 91 year old body to determine if she is strong enough to push air through lungs that have labored so hard for so many months.

But I'm glad the flowers and picture are there. And I'm glad for the time I have had to spend with her by myself. Holding her hand and talking. Kissing her head and tending to her. I hope she has heard me. And I hope she knows how much the kids and I love her. And how much we hope she sees Madeline's paper flowers soon.





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